Confessions of a Girl Who Has Too Much

It's not just me. You probably suffer from it too. The disease is not new, and it never gets cured because there is no known vaccine, nor is there medicine to ease the pain. We suffer together from this sickness. Yet you might not realize you're infected because it's a subtle killer, a vermin that lurks in the preaching of Culture and spews from the mouth of Media.

You and I are dying of greed. Slowly, but surely, we are being consumed by this sneaky little monster, and if we don't catch him before he gets us good, his disease - Consumerist Self-Centered Syndrome - will destroy our lives and ruin the possibility of our potential to change the world.

First off, I want to mention that wanting a cute new pair of shoes isn't necessarily an indicator of this syndrome. Neither is admiring someone's flower-shaped cake pan and asking them where they got it. But the syndrome can creep in at these points if you don't keep your focus and perspective on what matters. I've felt it clouding my good sense when I'm at a store I love, like Marshall's or Target. I arrived at the store with good intentions. Buy a zip-up hoodie because I need one. Soon, however, I've convinced myself that I also need three tank tops in bright jellybean colors, a new pair of fraying jeans, a bottle of my favorite perfume, and some amazing looking chocolates sitting by the register. Consumerist Self-Centered Syndrome takes over my mind as if I can no longer make sane decisions, and soon after I leave the store, the fog of greed lifts and I look in my bag in confusion. Did I really just buy all that? And for WHAT reason?

Okay, if you work hard and make a paycheck, I think it's great to go out and treat yourself to something. Or to buy what you need. Nothing wrong with that. We need to eat, drink, be clothed, and occasionally buy gifts and treat ourselves to something we deserve. Yet there's a limit to this frivolous living. When my church reminds me that there are folks in our congregation that have significant needs and that there will be a benevolent offering after church, I feel ashamed if I've spent all my cash on myself and have nothing else to give. When I pick up a brochure about a nonprofit or hear about war, flooding, starvation, human rights violations, sickness, and terrible terrible pain, I wonder suddenly why that syndrome had any power over me.

I came home from college this year to a room full of stuff I hadn't used all year. Basically, I boxed up my college stuff in like 50 assorted containers and still had enough to live on in my room and bathroom. Now that's amazing. I am so blessed with posessions, clothes, etc. that I have enough for two of me! Recently I came to the conclusion that I probably use like 20 percent of my belongings on a regular basis. Sad? Sort of. Pack-rat me is hoarding all the stuff while much of the world, many of my neighbors, are in need.

What's the answer to getting rid of this syndrome? I say the Bible says it pretty clearly... seek first the kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well (from Matthew 6). And give to the widows and orphans (from James 1). And love others as yourself! (the whole Bible!) When you start listening to Jesus, you start catching his compassion for the world. Now, I am far from living like Jesus. But for starters, I am realizing I need to do more. This summer I've gone through all my stuff and weeded out about 8 bags of things I don't use or need, and I'm going to sell them in a garage sale. The profits are going to Haiti, to people who may not even have a HOUSE. It's a start, but I've gotta keep steering clear of this disease of greed. In a culture that wants you to buy, buy, buy, it's not easy, but I'm working on it.

Like the common cold, you can catch just as quickly as you get rid of it.